Of Tea, Teapots, and Other Things
How working with patients can help us navigate the sunrises and sunsets of our own lives.
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Psychiatry does not always have all the answers. However, the ability we develop over the years to introspect, to be self-aware, and to look at ourselves from the outside becomes one of our most significant personal gains on this journey. That, accompanied by the lessons learned through following the trajectories of the lives of people we treat, sometimes is all we need to navigate the sunrises and sunsets of our own lives.
Being a psychiatrist and a parent, assessing and learning about my own limitations, has been one of the most enriching and humbling experiences of my life.
I love tea
And everything that goes with it
The teapots, the mugs, the trays
The doilies and all
The coming together at 5
The conversation
The warmth
The peace and
the energy.
We are a family of five
Took me a while to find a teapot for five
There are teapots for two
and then for six to eight
Very hard to find one for
five
The smaller one will make the tea too strong
the larger one, too dilute
Five for five
That’s perfect
Perfect every time.
A few years ago, my oldest
left
College, law school, job, and
pastures beyond
Everything we would want her to do.
Teatime became slightly quieter
But the teapot for five was still alright
Just a bit left over
Someone always wanted a little more
The tea was still great
If not perfect every time.
Two years later, the middle one
left
College, computer science, job, and
pastures beyond
Everything we would want her to do
I realized I have to adjust
Less water, lesser tea leaves
Little more work to have the tea taste good
The pot was still working
The tea was not great,
definitely not perfect,
but good enough every time.
Last year, my youngest left
Just college for now,
With plans for pastures beyond.
He makes us so proud.
I don’t like my tea anymore.
I don’t like that there is so much left over
I don’t like that I know I need a new teapot
A teapot for two
While the one for five comes out for holidays
I don’t like that some days we are too tired for tea
and other days, it does not seem that important
I don’t like that the pot for two makes the tea taste right
Actually perfect every time.
I love tea
And everything that goes with it
The teapots, the mugs, the trays
The doilies and all
The coming together at 5
The conversation
The warmth
The peace and
the energy.
Dr Sethi is a psychiatrist in private practice in McLean, Virginia.
